Amber Lynn Taylor

Here is a story of a girl that i thought would take me years to find, and years to loose.
On February 7, 2010, mine and Sarah's one month anniversary my best friend introduced me to a girl that i would come to adore. I knew two things at the time. 1) i was never serious with Sarah and 2) There was something about amber that no other girl has ever had. So that next week i kept texting amber back and forth, and having a lot of fun doing it. I broke up with Sarah the 17Th day of February, and then 6 days later I asked Amber out. Our first date was a super date. we went bowling and went and saw Percy Jackson and the lightning thief, then to the mall and to walmart. I remember our first kiss. in the back of the movie theater with her head in my lap. it was magical... On March 20 i went to her house for her little brother's birthday party, and that would be the day i would tell her how i really felt. Sitting in that red camping chair on her front porch with her in my lap. she thought i was pulling her toward me for a kiss, and with a lump in my throat i whispered to her those three words, i had promised myself so many years ago i would never say again. "I love you" she of course whispered them back. Never have i had a girl friend that could make me smile, loose my breath and fall so utterly in love before. too bad i would have to leave early because my grandmother had a stroke. and my family needed me. That too me is where it all went wrong, our relationship drifted into text messages and short phone calls. April 1 rolls around. Amber wanted me to go the beach. April fools lol... I told her my mom said i couldn't go, and me and Mrs. Melissa plotted an April fools joke that she would never forget. I woke her up April the 2ND and she looked a mess, but she was beautiful, she called me crazy for that all the time... that will be one of the things i miss the most. SO we had a great time at the beach. She was the 1st girl i ever kissed in the Atlantic ocean... Our final day will be today. April 4, 2010. Easter Sunday for most Christians. today will be the last day i can smile and think of her. everyone will offer me advice, and try 2 console my feelings, but i will become cold and heartless, and forget what matters most in this life, and stop looking for another girl, because none of them will be what i want, and if i do find sum1 i will always think back on this day and be afraid. i will not smile a natural smile for a while, but i will fake them and let everyone be happy, because i have enough on my shoulders, and i lost what i needed most. I love you Amber Lynn Taylor, but you have made a choice in this life, and that choice has affected both of us, and there is no way for me 2 become whole again as long as i still feel this way about you. love is a strength at times, but now it has turned into a weakness, and has brought me down to my knees, and i hope that no one ever has to go through this in their life... but until next time i hope you find trust in the lord, and find happiness and success in all your future endeavors
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

A day in the Life of A poster boy...

Yes everyone dreams that one day they will ge tto stand in front of a green screen as the photographer tells them to pose this way and that, bu tI would never want that. I am single as most of my readers know, and you also know that I am very unhappy being single. There comes a time in everyone's life that they are offered a chance to get away, and then you rely on your peers to give you the right advice, and then you still don't know what to do so you consult your counselors, and fellow teachers. you ultimately decide to stay put for another year, and hope things go better for you, and then that year goes by and you feel like that you have just stuck a knife in your own back.

Well my friends I have reached that very point in my life. I feel like I have lost my mind, and that there is no turning back. I can not even see a possible road back to happiness. Everytime someone attempts to get close to me i figure out a new way to become a self-centered asshole, and the only people i get close to are the ones I would not miss a meal to have even the slightest chance of a date with, and then there are the girls that i want to get close to, but they drive me away. Most people would look at all my issues I have with finding my poster girl, and tell me to go gay. Well that is not going to happen. I have accomplished a plethora of things, and any guy or girl has every right to be jealous and even envious. I do not ask for pietti for the whole situation, i do ask for understanding, and will not settle for anything less.

Most of you know that I have been under going the moral struggle of underage engagements, and through this whole pathetic, immature arguement i have not once wavered in my opinions. I believe that a 17 year old should not be engaged, havung sexual relations, or even the slightest bit of in intament relations with a 14 year old. Any parent who could knowingly allow this to go on is an abomination to society, and should never have had kids. There are some things that you must force your children to conform to in society.

We always say that we would rather our relationships to be this way or that, and be greatful that we have a relationship with this person. This position is completely wrong, and proves that once again people in our generation have chosen to settle rather than risk it to get the bisciut. I say that we should never settle, and settling will only produce a mild sense of contentment, and the hunger that is deep down is never fulfilled. We, as youth, should do anyything we can to take action, and make our world a better place.

We have all these clubs in school talking about savign the rainforest, and correcting our parent's generation's mistakes. Well my question is simply how can we correct another generation, if we are busy screwing up our own? Why are we critizing our parents for getting married at such a young age, and run off the next day get engaged and say whoops mom I'm pregnant? Will the world end in 2012? I don't think so... We have alot of things that need fixin' before this world can end. Religions vary between countries, and those who believe in the same founding principles cannot even agree on one simple concept. Science was once a major part of religion, and then some up tight ass hole comes along, and decides that science is trying to prove religion never happened. humans have this odd quality about them. They are curious creatures, and they are very quick to critize someone elses work. Why do we not convert to solar power? because all of those damn liberals in congress are to worried about who's gonna write their campaign check, and not actually do what they promised in the elections. America has become the monster, that we have so feverently tried to rid the world of. We are an infestation, and should not be allowed to breathe another breath. So take the time to smell the roses,a nd instead of bitching just shut up and take action. There is no sense in being this giant dog with all bark and no bite.

Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

omg

How I wish that some people could just understand that when someone doesn't love you anymore you just move on. I wish that Cody could understand that he has gabby, and I got Tyla and he should leave it at that. And I am going to date her regardless of what ppl say. You shouldn't care what other ppl say. Most likely the ppl that are talking about your life, don't have one themselves... SO the moral for today is keep your nose in your own business. Lifes too short to worry about someone elses. Remember big things happen when your worried about the little things.
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

How i honestly feel.

By some i feel used, threatened, and abused. I am tired of it. Manna needs to get off her high horse and stop being a bitch to everybody about everything. She isn't perfect. MY heart is telling me i need to tell tyla how i feel and get around ALL THIS I heart you bull shit. My head is saying don't never or at least not yet. I am scared shitless of the final outcome, I always am. They say the only thing we have to fear is fear itself. Well I don't know how i feel about that. It is behind me the whole telling her i have those kind of feelings, but I am chicken shit to tell her that i love her. I want so see her b4 she goes, but this weekend is the only weekend left i have with my mom b4 she goes. she is going to go see chandler saturday he is her nest friend, but where do i come into this category? Somebody freaking help me. I am totaly depressed on this matter. Her parents say that she can't come bc she already promised chandler. Oh well I will just have to see what i have to do. Crap i suck. Someone help me. I am scared that somehow i am going to screw up the marching band show, and everyone will hate me. I am scared of what people are going to say when they see my hair when i go to school. I am not doing what i am doing to it until after band camp. Ha ha ha help
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

Thats what i am going to do

Okay I am posting for today. As i thought of what i should post about. It suddenly came clear to me, that some of my friends, or some aquaintances, are in need of tons of advice.
Well to Lindsey and her situation. I must say that you should never go back out with that guy, I don't care if you go lesbian. My brother is a dick. You could find better things in you life. Oh and as for making laugh i have no idea what to tell you.
Britany, And Katie, you guys are next. I can't tell you what a friendship means. that is something you must both learn on your own. If you must I wish for you two to just realize, that when the going gets tough the tough stick together. these are troubled times, and we have no idea what will come tomorrow. We must keep our friends close, but our enemies closer.
I have enjoyed myself today, and will continue to do so. I however do not wish to see blodd of any sort spilt over a minor conflict. There is no need to break a friendship, over a lover. Katie you should try your best to become slightly less blocking of britany. I have no idea what is said between the two of you, but from whaqt i read, you two are not happy being friends. I tell this becuase you could make a grave mistake. Darn i already got a new message on myspace, so i have to go.
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

If you can't be with the one you love will you be with the one who loves you?

If you can't be with the one you love will you be with the one who loves you? I guess you could. I personal do not think that if you love someone you would be partiuarly happy with the one who loves you. So this statement is a little more difficult for me to explain. I can think of no examples in history, besides Romeo & Juliet. But they were even together for a little while. Matter of fact lets look at that. Romeo began the play in lust, which to me is a form of love, with a Nun. Well after realizing You can't get none from a Nun ROmeo is forced not to be with the one he loves. He finds Juliet, whom he is really horny for. She is in love with him. but she can not be with him, for she is to be married to that Charlse guy. I guess this means that you could be with the one who loves you with out being with the one you love.
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

What a stupid Lamb

Someone is in unconditionally in love with you. they live in north carolina and you live in georgia. they just broke up with their significant other for YOU! unfortunately you are afraid to say ok because you are very wishy washy and you change your mind very often. what do you do and why?
First off i do not believe that you can be unconditionally in love with someone. Secondly I do believe that if you already have asignificant other, and choose to sever ties for some one far away. You are stupid. If you wish to go along with this person's bull shit line that says they love you unconditionally go ahead. It is not my place to tell you that you can't.
I however feel that it is necessary to give all love a chance, but this is not a case of love. more lust. If you do not know this person in person, and have never shared face to face sentimentals with this one then you do not need be involved with this person.
So in closing I am against it 100% and to do this would violate all of these morals, and policies I have surrounded myself with.
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

Do you give me a reason to care?

There is always someone out there who really pisses us off and then expects us to care. I have to say i don't care how much i piss you off i don't expect you to care, hell i never expect much out of you anyways. I honestly don't care who you chose to date. it is not my job to tell you that you cant date that person. I am not your mother, I am not your father. I do not care what you do with your life. It is your life, and i expect you to live it. I am busy living mine. I interact with people of different natures. Is it my fault i like a variety of people in my life? lets see no... anyways... I make my decisions, and have a hard enough time with them, so how am i supposed to make all of your decisions?
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

My Sacrifice

Hello my friend, we meet againIt's been awhile, where should we begin?Feels like foreverWithin my heart are memoriesOf perfect love that you gave to meOh, I remember When you are with me, I'm freeI'm careless, I believeAbove all the others we'll flyThis brings tears to my eyesMy sacrificeWe've seen our share of ups and downsOh how quickly life can turn aroundIn an instantIt feels so good to reuniteWithin yourself and within your mind Let's find peace thereWhen you are with me, I'm freeI'm careless, I believeAbove all the others we'll flyThis brings tears to my eyesMy sacrificeI just want to say hello againI just want to say hello againWhen you are with me I'm freeI'm careless, I believeAbove all the others we'll flyThis brings tears to my eyesCause when you are with me I am freeI'm careless, I believeAbove all the others we'll flyThis brings tears to my eyesMy sacrifice, My sacrificeI just want to say hello againI just want to say hello againMy sacrifice.

Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

Why is the heart the most important organ, if it is so easily broken.

The heart is the center for life in a physical aspect. it pumps blood through out the body, and allows us to easlier maintain homeostasis, also known as life. It is a delicate organ also. In a more emotional point of view the heart is viewed as the processing plant for all of our love affairs. It is a dangerous thing to mess with. It can easily be fooled, and can not always lead us to the logical conclusion. most christian religions require

us to take ou god into our hearts, but in a surreal aspect, we just bring him into our minds, hence the pastor saying "believe" or "know" that christ is oursavior. the heart doesnt believe, know, or trust. Itsimply exists, and somehow leads us into love, lust, and allows us to live. Anoter thing is that we o easily allow people into our hearts becuase our brain just has to know that this person will supposedly love you forever, well in actual reality there is only one way to know if you will love someone forever. It is time. Time is of the essence. Do not believe this with one inch of you brain matter. Love can shatter your hurt.

“Perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically to those who hardly think about us in return.” UNKNOWN

i end with saying that love is a precious gift sent from above, does it matter who is up there? people of all religion dream of leaving this earth, but the only choice that can seem to be complete is that you are going up or down. seeing how I have began straying from topic i end with two more quotes.

“When you smiled you had my undivided attention. When you laughed you had my urge to laugh with you. When you cried you had my urge to hold you. When you said you loved me, you had my heart forever.” Unknown

"It is strange how often a heart must be broken before the years can make it wise” Sarah Teasedell

I end with my favorute quote, though i can not remember who said it i will leave an author out

"It is better to have loved, and lost; then to never had loved up at all."

Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

Looking For Love in all the wrong Places

We are all stressed with trying to find that one person who completes us. Its not that we will never find our other half. It is just that it is harder for some of us to find our soul mate. DO not get down on love. Or love will get down on you. Do not rush love look for love in everyplace. This includes getting out of your comfort zone. You maybe looking for love in all the wrong places. Do not try to plan your destiny it will bite you in the ass.
Truly yours,
Sir Patrick Ryan Eason

What we can do about love

No matter how much we love someone is there ever reall a way to tell wether or not they love us back? To me the answer is no. We can hope and Pray that they do but there is no guarantee that they love us. We can hear them say it all day long.. We can claim that they love us. We can Claim we will never leave we can do anything and say anything... but we will never be able to tell that we love someone. Everyone loves differently... for instance becuase i can Mikey only loves Gabby for her body and she will never realize this becuase she is just that stupid. And she already gave it up but that is her. I am the kind of guy that doesnt like to break hearts so sex comes when we are both ready it doesnt matter what other people say.. You should be able to love someone before pleasures of the flesh
May God take us into his kingdom one day at a time...